Fiscal Survival in Real Life

While watching TV commentary during my daily treadmill workout, as is my wont, I have observed the well-meaning, albeit pathetic "tips" about coping with our financial "meltdown" and economic recession. These efforts may actually do more harm than good for the perpetually perplexed, because the so-called financial experts who dispense these "tips" make it seem like it's some big mystery. It ain't.

If you are willing to accept on faith that nobody can beat the market consistently (the market just like the casino can not be beat in the long run), and you are willing to forgo your greedy-bastard instincts, read on.

TheBigHenry's Rules for Fiscal Survival in Real Life

1. Get a job. Can't get one? Get an education that will lead to a job. Too late? Ask Congress for a bailout.
2. Set aside enough cash (or cash equivalents) to get you through the inevitable rainy day. Around 6-month's salary is reasonable.
3. Pay for car and health insurance. Otherwise, a car accident or serious illness can ruin you financially faster than you can speed-dial your bud on your cell.
4. Begin saving for your retirement as soon as you have accomplished the foregoing.
5. The best possible investment vehicle is tax-deferred with matching contributions from your employer. Max that one out before contemplating any other scheme because employer matching is tantamount to 100% appreciation of your own money; instantly. This is also the only instance of free lunch in the whole universe.
6. Allocate your investment assets roughly 65/35 between stocks and bonds. The best way to do this is through a major balanced mutual fund, which has the added advantage of large-scale diversification and automatic rebalancing on a daily basis. Rebalancing is "secret code" for "selling high and buying low", something that every investor strives to achieve, and most fail to do consistently. If you must know how diversification and rebalancing work, read a book, which has the added advantage of reading a book.
7. Add to your investment portfolio (your balanced mutual fund) on a regular basis, at a preset rate you can afford so as to "dollar cost average" your cost basis. Yes, you can find all kinds of books if you need clarification. Reputable authors have lots of information you won't get from watching TV.
8. Minimize your debt. Debt is the single most disastrous habit infecting our society. And the other single most disastrous habit is greed.
9. If it sounds too good to be true, guess what? They are trying to sell you crap you don't need. Much better to donate the money to a worthy cause.
10. It's mostly about making choices that make sense. Don't let others do your thinking for you. Your brain is your friend.

Much as I am confident of the common sense in the above summarized rules, common prudence persuades me to direct your attention to the "My-ass Coverage" statement at the bottom of this page.